you can't see the tears i cry
behind these hazel eyes


untitled.

yupps.
thats the title of this post
cos i dont know wad to say
God. where u now?

every night in my dreams
i see you
i feel you

honestly. i feel as tho i've been banished to the moon. and locked there.

leaving in a mask u wear all day long
it just make you feel oh so strong

i sick of playing this game.
im tired of pretending to be happy.
i wanna scream
i wanna just stay out in the rain
letting it wash all over me
or.
just sitting somewhere. watching the world pass me.
with the knowledge that the world will still cont on w/o u
carry on fine.
people ask me wad would how would the world rmb me when ur gone
i tell them
unless u make billions like bill gates
start a war like adolf hitler
be a star actor/actress like maryiln manroe
no one will miss you
even your family and loved ones get over you after ur gone
the memories will hurt
but it wont change their lives

inadarkroom.thesilencescreamingaroundyou.thefierycoldnessallaroundyou.yourplusestartbeating.youstarttrembling.yourhandscan'tstopshaking.yourbodyisconvulsculating.youcan'twait.yourbreathingincreases.youreyesturnbloodred.youseethewaterfall.itstopsandstarts.itfallsintoapuddle.youscream.youcry.youfeeltheshiningbrightnesssurroundsyou.youstareintospace.youfeelwarmer.youwantmore.youneedmore.anditgoesblack.yourbodylimps.yourheartbeatsslowly.weaker.stops.nevertostartagain.

behindthemask.iwept.icried.idied.

ps. you know. Jesus blood took away our pain and suffering.